Secretary of State:
Gary Busey.
Let's send Gary Busey around the world, meeting with leaders; he could show them how to play guitar, he could have them watch his greatest movie ever, Eye of the Tiger, and he could regale them with tales of glitz and glamour, and share his opinions on world affairs. Then he could get lost, and nobody would ever find him. Except maybe the show Celebrity Rehab: Amsterdam.
Treasury Secretary:
MC Hammer.
Honestly, what better choice to watch over the country's economy than this man? He was a very rich man, who sqaundered his fortune away on entourages and bling. He is like a Phoenix rising from the ashes. He's been poor, he knows what it's like. He will take the US economy and raise it back to the level it once had. All Obama needs to do is keep him away from the local Hummer dealership. Three words for the American people: MEDALLIONS FOR EVERYBODY!!!
Secretary of Defense:
Richard Simmons.
He would have the US military in shape, for sure. He would also have our soldiers in touch with their softer side, ensuring the safety of those they are protecting. Let's face it, no country would threaten the US and it's allies again, because they would be faced with years of torture if captured. Sweatin' to the Oldies...skimpy shorts...white thighs...those hands...*shiver* Truly, the US military has found it's secret weapon. C'MON GIRLS, LIFT THOSE LEGS HIGHER!!!!
Secretary of Education:
Michael Moore.
O All-Knowing One, teach us. Lead us in to the blissful land that is education. Show us the facts and the truth as you know them. See to it that no child is left behind. And let's see how many films you make while Bush is out of office. You have no material left, so you may as well spend your time doing something, right? O Intelligent Being, show us the way to enlightenment.
This Cabinet is most certainly empty.
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